Resources for the Apocalypse

and places to find joy

Feb 03, 2025

Dear Reader,

I’m sitting here finishing my newsletter and watching theend of Democracy in American. I am in a surprisingly good mood! In part becausewe are getting a lovely mountain storm here in the northern Sierra Nevada andpartly because there is a lot to be hopeful about. I’ve been asked by a numberof readers to include tips, things to read, ways to rebel in this newsletterand so I have. Going through those resources is what is giving me hope.

This is a long letter, folks! I’ve added in headings to makeit easier to find the stuff you care about.

Acts of Rebellion

The current administration is horrible. Absolute shit showof humanity and policy. They have done all sorts of damaging and destructiveacts in their first two weeks. I don’t want to take away the impact thesehorrid things have done to people across the world. But there are also peopleand groups rebelling and pushing back against these actions.

Keep in mind that the vast majority of Executive Orders onlyapply to government agencies, and only to those often after other rule makingprocesses have occurred. This means that there are people and companies pushingback and letting them know what the current administration is doing is notokay.

When it comes to the stupidity of declaring “two sexes”from a guy who couldn’t pass freshman biology, school boards across the countryhave said that no,we will not change the way we serve students of all genders. In California,and a few other states, state officials issued statements that driver’slicenses with an ‘X’ (gender not declared, nonbinary) markers will remainvalid and you can renew them. California and a few other states also introducedlegislation to prevent medical professionals and insurance companies fromsharing medical information with states and federal government agencies when itcomes to providing reproductivecare and genderaffirmative care.

There were several actions taken to demoralize and dimmish careercivil service. For those not familiar with the inner workings of state andfederal agencies, career civil service can look like protections for lazy and inefficientindividuals. Yes, there are inefficiencies in government. I struggled withthose when I ran a state agency. The allowable error rate on data entry in CAis abysmal. Yes, there are out of date systems and computers. .However, theorders and buy-outs to “fix” these problems is akin to realizing someone needstheir gall bladder removed and then handing a pair of pruning sheers to araccoon and pointing at someone’s belly. Musk and Trump are what happen when weallow white male mediocrity to triumph.

Employee labor organizations havesued the Administration to prevent a lot of these changes. Many folks arerefusing to take the buy-out (and seriously, unless you were planning onretiring in the next month anyway, the damn thing doesn’t make economic sense).

When it comes to the roll-back of DEI, the order ONLYcovered government agencies. HOWEVER, corporations jumped on this bandwagon toroll back their DEI work. While the list of places who were quick to shed theirprograms is gravely disappointing, it also made it clear who is on our side.Other groups doubled down on DEI and stood up the pressures of boards andpublic. We now know where to spend our dollars. As the list is in flux, I’m notlinking to any given list, but keep an eye out in the media links below forupdated information.

Then there are small acts that collectively fucked up the government.The DOGE started a tip line for employees to report when people in their agencywere still supporting DEI efforts. It was spammedwith a ton of porn. The NationalImmigrant Justice Center put out a clear and short version of what your rightsare when you encounter ICE agents that quickly spread on the internet and inreal life. It includes tips on how to protect those in your life who might notbe documented and is really useful. Canada issued tariffs on American goods, butonly those from red states. Trump’s response was that Trudeau (CA PrimeMinster) “misunderstood” the US tariffs (read: You weren’t suppose to returnthe action! Waaaa!)

Locally, there has been a lot more engagement in the LGBTQ+groups here. Dyke Night in January had more than 40 people and over2/3rds were new. I launched the LGBTQ+ story share hour and we had 25folks show up and 7 shared stories. Grass Valley has launched a weekly SafeSpace for LGBTQ+ youth between 14-19. And we continue to grow. All of thismakes me really happy!

Feeling Overwhelmed or Distraught?

I know not everyone can find light in the things I’ve postedabove. Additionally, some readers are in very tenuous situations. I’ve had morethan a dozen conversations in the past two weeks about whether it is better toflee the country now or later.

Feeling overwhelmed and unable to make a move is what thistype of action and media blitz is designed to do. It is a very intentional moveby the administration to reduce pushback and deplete resistance. You don’t haveto fall for it.

I do all of the following and will vouch for thesepractices. I also have the studies behind them, but lived experience tells me,they are effective.

1. Limit what policy areas you follow.Seriously. Close your tabs. Stop reading about all the bad stuff. Choose two,maybe three if you have a ton of emotional bandwidth and stick to staying ontop of those things. If something outside of your sphere happens that is reallygoing to impact you, people will let you know.

2. Stop getting news from social media. Itis just a clusterfuck of AI, bots, and rumors. Treat every post on social mediawith extreme suspicion. I’ve listed some reliable news sources and rumor bustingsites in the “Resources for the Apocalypse” section below. Stick to those for information.

3. Can’t get off social media? There aresettings on every phone and in most social media apps where you can program atime limit. Set those limits to 15 minutes a day for social media sites.Protect your mental health.

4. Physically connect with others you resonatewith. It’s science. Humans need to be in the same physical locations as othersthey feel safe with to help regulate their brains and bodies. Make time to gettogether with folks you trust and regulate yourself.

5. Touch grass. It is important to getoutside. It could be a park, a walk around the block, a hike, or gardening, butget outside. Every day is best, but aim for most days, at least for a fewminutes. It is literally grounding to be outside on dirt.

6. Practice mindfulness. This could bemeditation (silent, walking, guided all work). Create a gratitude journal orjar. Take 15 minutes to breathe deeply. These things help reset our brains andbodies and create a sense of calm.

7. Resist. Find the ways you can push backagainst the system to empower yourself. This might be existing loudly in your ownskin in public. It could be attending organizing groups; protesting; donatingLGBTQ+ books to your library, or any other action which makes you feel somelevel of power over the bullshit going on out there.

Auntie Vice Updates

The book on mental health and BDSM is chugging along. I wentback to a bunch of notes from classes I’ve taught on the subject and realized peoplehad questions about what a diagnosis means, how to talk about a diagnosis, etc.I added a chapter on this. Feeling pretty good about that. I’m aiming to finishsometime in March and get a full draft to my editor. Fingers crossed I am ontime to get it out to the public in early 2026.

I’ve started recording stuff for Fat Chicks on Top andwill drop new episodes in late March. Had to put that on pause for a minute becauseof health and writing obligations. Getting back into it feels good. Stay tuned!

I keep adding stuff to the blog and substack. If you need more Auntiebetween newsletters, you can subscribe to either. Additionally, I list events,tickets, and community events on the blog.

Healthwise, I am still struggling with some pancreas stuff.That organ is a little bitch. I’ll know more next week as to what is going onwith me. Fingers crossed it is an easy fix!

Resources

I’ve included a ton of resources in this newsletter. Manyhave been requested by readers. Need something? Want info on something? Hit meup and I’ll get you the links!

Stay Kinky,

Auntie Vice

Upcoming Events

Dyke Night

Feb. 26th & March 26th, 6:00 - 8:00 PM

The Cauldron @ Loot & Lore, 107 W. Main Street, Grass Valley, CA

FREE, All ages, genders, & sexual orientations welcome

Every Friday Night LGBTQ+ teens have a safe space in downtown Grass Valley. Friday Nights OUT is a push to get queer adults to go out in downtown so youth can see us! Support local businesses and have a great time!

Gays & Goats

Feb. 9, 12-3, Come join community and play with cute baby goats! Hosted by a local queer couple on their farm. Families encouraged! All welcome.

Text 530-264-0560 for private address.

Upcoming Class

Canna-Service, April 20, 4:15 - 6:20 PM PST ONLINE

Want to learn how to safely use cannabis with your kink? Interested in sexy joint rolling and smoking skills? Join me for the canna service class online (with a recording available afterward to ticket holders).

Get your tickets here.

Consensual Non-consent, March 11, 7-9 PM PST ONLINE

Consensual non-consent is one of the most common fantasies for adults. Want to learn the in’s and out’s of negotation, establishing on-going consent, safety concerns, and what to do if things go wrong? Join me for this FREE online class offered by Sacraemnto Education Exchange. Sign up for thier group on Fetlife for the Zoom link.

Reading for the Revolution

All links are to Bookshop.org, a website supporting local bookstores. Please consider using this over Amazon. Your local library may have these books. If they don’t many libraries offer a way to request they purchase titles. Using this service can get these great reads into your local library.

If you live in Nevada County and have a library card to any branch, you can use the ZIP Books form. If the title is not in the library and has been published between 2004 and 2024 you can request the book. They will buy it, send it to your home, and then you return it to get it into the collection.

Angela Davis. (1983). Women, Race, and Class.

Ijeoma Oluo. (2024). Be a Revolution.

Julia Serano. (2013). Excluded.

Roxane Gay. (2014). Bad Feminist.

bell hooks. (2014). Feminism is for Everybody.

Sabrina Strings. (2019). Fearing the Black Body.

Howard Zinn. (2015). A People’s History of the United States.

Jounral Prompts & Kinky Inspiration!

How will I reground myself during this political upheaval?
When I am scared or distraught, where do I feel it in my body? How do I calm my body?
What makes me feel powerful?
What are the underlying principles I want to remain true to during this upheaval?
Who can I trust?
Slow, purposeful breathing can connect partners. Try beginning a scene by holding one another and slowly breathing together for 2-4 minutes before play.
It’s conference season announcement time! Conferences around the world are in the process of announcing their educator line up. Find one you want to attend this year!

Bring some silliness into your play! Get weird. Add props. Find something to make each other laugh and connect through joy.
Curious about adding formal cannabis service to your play? Sign up for my 4.20 class beginning at 4:20 PST online.
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